What do you think when you hear people talking about self love? Does your mind instantly wander to some actress, musician, or famous person? Is it really possible to attain self love?
I have found that on this ride we call life, there are so many possibilities as to what beauty is. There is no one set of rules that one must follow to be beautiful. Isn’t that great? That means there is no pressure for all of us to look the same, act the same, or just be the same.
I remember when I started the self love journey, I figured that it was something that was unattainable. Something that was written for use in books alone. I assumed that I would need to be 5’10” with long legs, blonde hair, size 2, perfect skin, and a wardrobe to die for. Funny huh? Since that 5’10”, long legs, blonde hair, size 2 and perfect skin was something that I would clearly NEVER amount to. I mean I am 5’3″, size 16, brown hair, short legs, and I sport pimples. I truly thought that I was a helpless case.
It wasn’t until I dove into the whole self love concept that I realized that hair color, pants size, length of legs, and skin had anything to do with self love. The outside factors played no role in what beauty really is. The only factors that mattered were the factors that were on the inside.
Now I’m not talking kindness, patience, and charismatic. Yes those are all fantastic qualities to have and they will play a role in your beauty. (Hence a positive person will be much more beautiful than a negative person will be.) I am talking about something even different than that.
I’m talking about the way we view ourselves. The way that we see our reflection on a daily basis. Imagine waking up and walking into your closet, picking out something to wear, and just automatically feeling fabulous as you look at your reflection.
Honestly, this was the hardest part of the journey for me. Feeling comfortable and confident in the clothing I wore. I dreaded waking up every morning and searching through my closet that I felt just mediocre in. Nothing made me say, “Damn I feel sexy today!” It wasn’t the clothing itself. It was my perception of the clothing.
Everyone can achieve self love. It isn’t some radical ideology that is impossible to attain. It is the feeling of knowing that your body is yours. It is magnificent in all that it does.
Once I started looking at my body with eyes that appreciated what it all does for me, my perception started to change. Of course this was not an overnight change. It also wasn’t a change that was easy. It came with tears and heartbreak. It also came with the knowledge that I can beat the self hatred. I can overcome anything once I know what my true worth is.
Self love is the hardest thing you will ever fight for in your life. Self love is the hardest thing you will ever teach those around you. Self love is also the most generous gift that you can teach someone.
This is a great gift to have. It also means that not everyday you will feel like you look damn sexy. You will still have those moments when you doubt yourself and your sexiness. Everyday you need to wake up and remember to fall in love with yourself all over again.
It’s time to be confident, be sexy, and fall in love with yourself. It is time to show the world that you are a force to be reckoned with. That you will put up with no more shaming on who you are.
That 5’3″, short legged, brown haired, pimple faced woman that you are can now walk confidently down the street. You will get those looks from the women that wonder how you got the confidence that you did. That is when you look at them, smile, and say, “You are beautiful too!!”