NO this will not be a bashing post. For me, it is to remind myself that what we say can mean different things to different people. How we each take it also differs greatly and what we think someone means, they had no intent on it meaning that.
Lately, Richard has been working hard. This past Saturday he put in at least a 12 hour day. I know that I need to tell him more often that I appreciate how hard he works. This morning he said something to me that bothered me. Bothered me enough that I sort of dwelled on it today when I shouldn’t have because I really don’t think that he meant it the way I took it.
As I was laying in bed barely able to open my eyes, he came in from the shower to get dressed for work. These past couple weeks have been completely trying and I am exhausted. Annie has been having screaming matches at bedtime which in turn wakes Iliza up so then I have 2 screaming children up until 11pm every night. On top of that, Izzy is teething so last night her and I maybe managed 4 hours of sleep. So I was a bit on edge this morning and my exhaustion level is starting to catch up.
He walks in the room (which is a complete disaster zone because I just haven’t been able to keep up with normal housework let alone extra work), and says that he is still tired. I half jokingly say, “Must be nice to have been sleeping by 9:30pm last night.” Yes I was probably super sarcastic but I will be blaming my lack of sleep.
His response was, “It was. I have been doing long hours.” Now it is a simple statement. I left it as it was and just laid back down on the bed after he came and kissed me goodbye and left for the day. Then I got to thinking and starting to get a bit irritated.
Does he not think I work? What about the long hours I put in EVERY DAY? I don’t get a day off. My weekends aren’t a time where I can just sit back, relax, and hope that someone does my work. Lately I have been putting in 20 hour days with no pay and little appreciation.
Now remember what I said above, not all things that people say are meant to be heard the way we hear them.
After all, I own and run a business from my home, I do the household work every day, I make sure lunches are made for my children, take my daughter to kindergarten everyday, and the list could go on and on. I am up at 6am most days and still up fighting with 2 screaming children until 11pm. I don’t get any down time.
I know that he didn’t mean it the way he said. Well at least he better not have. This is more of just a little story to remind each of you to appreciate what the other spouse is doing. Even if your spouse stays home doesn’t mean she/he is working any less harder than you.
Now where is the alcohol!?!?!?!